Stephanie cut me off again because she wants me to be on her side. She asked me if I knew Frankco was going for supervised visits and I didn't.  I told her talking to Frankco stresses me out so I don't talk to him., for my health.  She's mad at George for deriding her for not getting round trip tickets for the kids.  I never told him Steph gave Frankco gas money.  She thinks we are not supportive.  After all these years, she's asking for more support than I have left.  Even if its just emotional support.  And I'm numb from so many gut wrenching crises.  And she needs money all the time.  And I'm tired of the pain.  But when these altercations happen,  she gets suicidal.  Which is always hanging over my head, but I'm tired.  And I know she has some mental issues, which I'm partially responsible for.  I did my best and actually think I was a good enough mom.  And even if she threatens suicide, I have nothing to offer.  I can barely be a grandma to her kids.

I told her I was angry at her.  I am angry to death.

She nickeled and dime'd me out of more than $6000 when she was in high school.
She went absolutely out of control when she left Frankco, shoplifting in front of the kids, promiscuity, stealing Go Fund Me money.
Running off to Kentucky with a guy she met online and leaving her kids with Miriam and I.  We took them back to Frankco.
Stella earned $55 dollars and Steph didn't have the money to pay her so I sent her the money and Steph never paid her.

But I'm numb.

August 27, 2018

Made it  back to Idaho last night after a fun sleepover with Stella and Yogi.  The feeling of this Idaho house is peaceful, slower, a great retreat.  Projects galore.  George completed the deck around the house which is so nice, and is partially done with the pool decking.  I put an add on Craig's list to rent Charlie's house last night, had 10 responses by this morning and rented it to a nice couple who just returned from a military stint in Germany.  I am excited to get to know them better.